Taking own advice and being gentle

 Happy Holidays!  

December is such a busy month.  The holidays (lots of them to celebrate), school concerts, shopping, events both at work and home. Oh lets toss family into the mix.  Deep breath.

Looking back at this year we see hardly any posts. It was our worst year posting. That said we decided to take our advice and NOT beat ourselves up.  Life happens. Period. So we didn't post a lot this year. It is neither good or bad. It just is. There is nothing to apologize for or beat ourselves up over.

Taking our own advice of being gentle. It is okay to have off days. It is okay to not get everything done on the to do list. It is okay to, well, not post as much as we wanted. It is okay to let life happen. 

Our time and energy are not limitless. Acknowledge that. We don't want to take a limit resource, which is what time and energy are, and use it to rant about not being good bloggers. To take our energy and rant over something we no longer have control over. 

We would rather take that energy and yes time and enjoy the holiday season. To be gentle and let go of expectations not met. We're all human. Be gentle. Take a breath. Let it go. We start over and that is okay. So happy holidays. Enjoy the season. Let go of negativity and regrets. Waste of energy.  Remember we only have so much so spend your time and energy on things that bring you joy.

Happy Holidays

Enjoy the season

Take care.

How we are pulling the holidays together (sort of)

 Divide and conquer is part of how we are tackling this. November is here and calendars are filling up. Are you free XX? No? What about XX?  You know the drill. It has started.

We have a cookie exchange party planned. It is a way to get some yummies in our cabinet. Plus a get together before the rush. Some of us are not "bakers" but there are enough easy cookie recipes out there that it shouldn't be too stressful. 

Christmas stuff is in the shops NOW. We saw some out before Halloween. If you see if pick it up - don't think "oh too early" Grab it.  Start your stocking stuffers now when you are picking up Advil. Which you should have on hand for the upcoming holiday season.

Decide how much you want to decorate. Just a tree? Not a tree but a mantle. We don't have to impress other people. We get to decided what is enough. Put a wreath on your door and be done with it. Some people all out. A neighbor has five trees he puts up. Lovely but not for everyone. Don't let others tell you what is enough. You decide.  Less is more.

Have a budget and don't go over. Kids don't need everything on their list. Don't create a monster who has unreal expectations later in life. Maybe go out for a meal with friends each paying their own. You are enjoying each other company and that is what it is about. Create a holiday now that is NOT stress come January.

Start going through your holiday stash when you have a free evening now. Toss out what isn't working (or no longer you).  Jot down what you need. Cards? Pick up next time when out. Don't forget stamps before the rush.

If you exchange names and it is not already happened. Do it ASAP.  Try and get anything in the mail as early as possible. 

It is okay to say no if you feel overextended. We can't be in two places. Or say no if you need an evening at home to make magic happen. 

Holidays should be about family and friends. Not keeping up appearances, stressing out, getting in debt. Keep it simple.  

The time between the holidays

 Happy holidays.  It is the time between Christmas and New Year. Where some of us are breathing again and some of us are re-ramping up.  New Year's parties anyone?

Family gatherings. Packing and leaving the house or making space for incoming.  Trying not to stress over sleeping arrangements, flights arriving/leaving on time, enough food, family dynamics (who to sit next to who) and spending too much. Most of all expectations that might be met or not met. We put so much on ourselves over making the perfect holiday. It is even possible?

We had a talk before the holidays about expectations and lowering them. We can't make it perfect for everyone as we don't know what people expect or even how they will react. Some people love drama. Others detest. So we tried (emphasis that word) to not expect things to be perfect. We did our best and worked at letting it go. 

Okay place not as clean as I would want. Didn't get all my cards sent out. Can't control flights so not taking that on or apologizing like my fault. Saying yes if people offer to clean up or bring something. Leaving dishes in sink to talk to people now. Lowering what I expect - like behavior I have no control over especially adults. Big thing don't apologize for other adults' behaviour. That is on them not us. Learn to walk away if starting to feel stressed. That is what bathrooms and bedroom are for.

To start the year with lessons learned. Lower expectations for holidays and people. Enjoy them where they are coming from. Don't expect to fix them or fix everything around you. Learn to let stuff go. Don't take stuff on that doesn't concern us. Put ourselves higher on the priority list. This is what we want to head into the new year with. Lessons learned and put in place.